you fooled me

tell me im a mistake,
take out your knife,
split through my stomach,
and dig out the knots.

smear the blood
over memories
that remind me of you.

tarnish whats left,
leave no strands
for me to hang onto.
make your cuts deep,
and this time hard.

because i wish i could hate you.

moments felt at our best,
evaporate to nothing,
like a slap across my face,
they werent enough,
for you.

you hold more than you realize,
words to mend these wounds.
if i could hear you cared,
see you needed,
i could show you my heart.

you cant give me a reason
to let my guard down.

smother me with past,
suffocate me with my mistakes.
watch me struggle
to pull your hands from my throat.

tell me you need me,
that you want me,
and id pull you out,
before the water hits your lungs.

but your content to drown,
to let this die,
wilter and decay.
we both have bloody hands,
and short breath.

exasperated attempts fail.

deep wounds will heal
into pink scars
like souveniers
of days we lost.

times i loved.
moments sweet.

pulse of memories fade
to a low whisper
as you let me take
my last breath.

youre killing me.